#201 - The Trust Recession: How Ari Galper Uses Trust-Based Selling to Close Deals Faster

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AI will try and mimic as much of a human being as possible and they'll probably get better
and better at it.

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So the only way to win this game against the computer is for us humans to get better at
trust building, to learn how to build trust with other humans a lot better.

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Welcome back for another show.

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love it when there's somebody on the complete opposite side of the world, whether I'm
supposed to say that or not.

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He could be sitting next door like a lot of traditional news companies and studios, but
he's not coming to us from us, Sydney, Australia, my 4pm Eastern.

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It's his 7am the next day.

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So today's guest, I usually get this right, but I didn't make sure I had the pronunciation
on his last name, but we have Ari.

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Look at this guys.

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You know what?

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It's as it says G A L P E R.

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He's widely recognized as the world's leading authority on trust-based selling.

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He's the creator of the OneCall Sale and founder of REAI, which is helping businesses
eliminate pressure and close deals through trust-based conversations.

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the author of multiple bestselling books, not just one, not just two, but I believe seven,
including Trust in a Split Second.

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It's been featured in Forbes, Inc.

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Magazine, and CEO.

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In this episode, we're breaking down why traditional sales is broken.

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how to collapse long sales cycles into a single conversation and what Ari calls the trust
recession.

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Ari, welcome to the show,

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Thank you, glad to be here, excited.

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Yeah, man.

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um...

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the trust recession what we're talking about

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Well, you know, it's funny because it's a term I coined a while back and here's what I'm
talking about.

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I believe we are now what I call a commoditized economy where we are being shopped because
other people do what we do.

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People are going online, look at profiles on LinkedIn, looking at websites and going,
okay, I want X.

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I want the solution.

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So they're in shopping mode.

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When they get a hold of you on the phone, they're already thinking, okay, I'm going to be
looking at this solution.

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And then we do their best we can to provide them value.

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Sometimes it's called, I call it free consulting.

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where we do over delivery, give them free information, spend time with them in the hope we
impress them with our value.

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But it turns out value has been commoditized, has no value pre-sale.

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And then what happens is at the end of the call, they say this to you, they say, thank you
so much, I wanna thank you about it.

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You're like, thank you about it.

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I just gave you my heart and soul.

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Then we end up chasing them, chasing them, following up with them.

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That's what I call the cycle, the trust resided cycle.

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People are stuck in right now.

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Because there's no trust in the person shopping.

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you knowing that they can trust you.

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So I forgot a way Mark to crack that code once and for all to never chase anybody ever
again.

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Well, how do we crack the code?

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Well, how we do is we got to first change your mindset, got to change your whole
architecture of how you've been conditioned to sell because we've been taught that our job

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is to build a relationship first with the person.

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They got to like us, we got to get along, you got to have chemistry.

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And I'm suggesting to you today that the way to make this shift is to change your whole
self image from trying to become their best friend to being more of the doctor.

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You're the doctor, they're the patient.

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When you go see a doctor, what's the first thing they say to you?

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They don't say, Hey, I your shoes.

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Let's have a cup of coffee.

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Hey, nice to hear it.

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Nice to hear your voice.

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No, they say, where does it hurt?

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That's it, tell me what's wrong.

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Right.

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Well, they use bed, obviously it's not their bedside manner, hopefully, and empathy.

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It's not like you're clinical about it, but the point is they are problem centric, not
solution centric.

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See, as experts like us, when we hear someone's problem, it was a new opportunity.

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Our brain goes boom, boom.

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Yeah.

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Perfectly qualified.

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Got them.

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Then we're off to the races to our next step.

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Why?

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Because we have what's called the expert syndrome.

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We've heard their issues so many times in our marketplace.

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It's not new to us.

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So we got, got this.

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You're right.

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As opposed to.

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A doctor has to follow process, not make assumptions and do a deep dive to get a core
truth of what the actual issue is, whether the person wants to hear it or not.

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So it's a different way of thinking about this, but it requires letting go of your old
habits and conditioning of one, doing free consulting, two, stop delivering value, deliver

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clarity instead, and essentially don't try to get them to like you, only respect you.

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Where did this start for you?

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Not to like tell this full Ari story and stuff, but what caused you to go down this path?

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Great question.

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There was a pivot story that happened to me two decades ago and here's what happened.

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I'll make it quick.

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I was working for a high tech software company.

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We launched the first online website tracking data collection tools.

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Now it's called Google Analytics.

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But we were the first one to launch that in California when I obviously from there.

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You probably got the accent.

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And anyway, so was managing 18 reps underneath me salespeople.

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And the big leads came across my desk.

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And one day got a phone call inbound from the website.

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And I'm talking to this guy, he works for a huge business company and recognize the name,
multiple websites.

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And he's like, Hey, we love your, what you've got.

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We want to see a demo of your, of your offering.

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I said, great.

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And if I close this one deal, would double revenue in one sale.

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That's how big it was.

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So they agreed to agree to a date and time for a demo.

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They finally came four o'clock in the afternoon.

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I'm in my conference room with my CEO, big long conference table on the table is the old
school member, the Polycon, uh, speakerphone thing we used to have years ago.

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I hit that speaker phone and I dialed the dial number and my guy's like, Hey Ari, like,
hey, how's it going John?

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like, good, good.

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He says to me, Hey Ari, let us tell you who's with us on the phone today.

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Great.

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I know someone else to be there.

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Next thing I hear is, my name is Mike, I'm CEO.

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I'm like, Ooh, this is good.

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My name is Chris, I'm head of global IT.

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Amazing.

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This is Julia, head of global marketing.

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Impressive.

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Everybody on this call was a what?

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Yeah.

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They're all there.

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It's gonna happen.

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It's gonna happen now.

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I got one shot.

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So I'm still my confoundly self.

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I explain what we do.

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Then I have them log in to a webinar type tool back then to show them live on one of their
websites, a prototype of how to get a login and see all their live stats.

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So they all log in.

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I start walking through everything and start hearing this noise on the phone call like.

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This is amazing.

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How does this work?

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And they start asking me all kinds of questions.

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And of course I had all the answers.

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There was so much chemistry on this phone call, Mark.

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It was like a love fest on the phone.

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You know I'm talking about?

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They got the questions, you got the answers.

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You're saying to yourself, what?

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Damn, this is so good.

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The chemistry, no resistance.

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I'm loving this.

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They're qualified.

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An hour goes by.

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My contact is me already.

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This is amazing.

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We love this.

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Give us a call a couple of weeks, follow up with us and we'll move this thing forward.

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I'm like, thank you God.

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Oh my God.

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This is my year.

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I'm one call.

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This is amazing.

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I said my goodbyes.

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I took my hand, reached for the speakerphone on the table there as I'm reaching for the
off button on the phone.

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By complete accident, I hit the mute button instead of the off button and a small click
happened and they thought I hung up the phone.

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And you heard the honest truth, the things that they weren't willing to share and that for
some reason they just, humans are still, God wants you to continue going, but humans are

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still doing this and tell me if I'm wrong.

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I want you to fully circle back to this.

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But after you get done with this story, I want to ask you a question because you might say
I'm doing it wrong and I'm even teaching it wrong.

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But what I want to know, I've been telling myself for long time, I want to know what
they're going to say when I leave the room.

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I personally do want to know.

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because maybe you're gonna teach us to do it a different way, but I wanna know every
objection, not that I'm gonna overcome it specifically, but I wanna know every objection

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that everybody could possibly have to my product so I can deal with it right then.

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At least that's the way I approach things.

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So keep with your story and then tell me if we're doing it wrong or what the nuance is to
this.

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That's fine.

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So I pulled my thumb back.

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They start talking amongst themselves thinking I had left a call.

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And so you would expect things like what after a call like that.

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But you would think how you were feeling, you would expect to hear the same things that
they told you, but they poked 18 holes in it.

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They were probably talking about you, some things they didn't like about you, or, let's
just do this on our own.

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Let's find a way to do it cheaper.

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Hey, let's go out and all that's probably what was happening.

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Here's what they said word for word.

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I'll never forget it.

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That's why we're here today.

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Here's what they said.

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They said, we're not going to go with him.

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Keep using him for more information and make sure we shop someplace else cheaper.

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Knife in heart twist.

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I was in a state of shock.

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I could not believe it.

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And I hit the off button.

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I looked at the wall and I said to myself, what did I do wrong?

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I was competent.

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I was professional.

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I built a relationship.

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I could solve their problem.

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They loved it.

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And I realized that moment that for whatever reason, they were not comfortable telling me
the truth.

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And I said to myself, that's it.

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Selling has become a dysfunctional relationship.

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Unhealthy.

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Two parties not feeling comfortable telling each other the truth is bad.

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So I decided to launch my whole way of thinking around this to untangle this complicated
relationship to finally build enough trust from hello, where both parties feel comfortable

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telling each other the truth.

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There's no games, no follow-up, no guessing, no pipeline, no nothing.

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It's either onboarding or offboarding and that's it.

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That's kind of what I was referring to and talking about, right?

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You're going to have some strategy to it, but I just found the way that I think I didn't
have as good of a moment as you do because you being in that moment and being willing to

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be self-aware to ask yourself the question, what did I do wrong?

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Because even if you did a really good job, the way most professionals taught you to be a
salesperson, you still were having that outcome.

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So many people want to blame the client.

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What you did in that moment is why you're sitting here today on what you built.

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Well, I made it my mission, my life mission to help people who sell learn.

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Here it comes.

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It sounds very country and my mission is to help them stop selling, stop all that
conditioning, but instead learn a new skill, which is how to build trust.

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Now it's not relationship building.

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This is the distinction.

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Relationship building takes a lot of time.

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You don't get trust with someone until after the relationship is built.

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Who's got time?

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They're gone shopping somewhere else by then.

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Instead, you the relationship piece out.

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You only focus on trust.

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They don't have to like you.

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They just have to respect you.

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But people who sell, they do a rapport.

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Hey, how's it going?

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Nice to meet you.

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We work really hard to get them to connect with us, build rapport, but they know it's a
game.

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They don't want to become your friend, nothing personal.

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They just want their problem solved.

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But we always add a social structure before the business structure.

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So how can you break this down in a 40 minute call with us without us buying the book,
without us paying for the thing yet?

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How can you give it away without giving it away so we understand a little bit?

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I'll give it all away and there's no buying the book in fact it gives you for free at the
end so you guys don't worry about buying anything.

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If you want my book for free I'll get you a copy in a second when we're done, okay?

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call set in the Set in the table Ari, that's what that is for you to say Mark, you don't
have to buy it.

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I'm going to give it

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Nice setup.

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Didn't think about that.

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But let me walk you through it now.

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Okay, I'll give you the architecture of how this works.

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Let's say you're on a first call mark with a lead, say a LinkedIn or lead through your
business, right?

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First opportunity, you can tell they looked at advanced affiliate within your zone of They
show up on Zoom.

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What's the first thing you would normally do on Zoom?

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How do you normally begin your calls?

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here's what I'm gonna say, I don't have this traditional sales approach now, man, it's how
we got on the phone.

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It's the things I started, I'm not trying to have you like, but I wanna establish some
level of, I've never taken a lie detector test, but I've seen the movies and the people

229
00:12:23,374 --> 00:12:26,547
doing it, they're trying to establish the truth and lies.

230
00:12:26,547 --> 00:12:29,689
I'm just trying to establish that with a human that I can read what's going on.

231
00:12:29,689 --> 00:12:36,430
So I'm not trying to not answer the question, but I'm trying to get a feel for you on how
I know this is gonna be a truthful interaction.

232
00:12:36,430 --> 00:12:39,730
So let's say I say hello, I'm a lead and you show up.

233
00:12:39,730 --> 00:12:40,650
What do you normally say?

234
00:12:40,650 --> 00:12:41,130
Not sure quite.

235
00:12:41,130 --> 00:12:42,026
What do you just say?

236
00:12:42,026 --> 00:12:43,699
I'm not saying, I'm not saying sorry.

237
00:12:43,699 --> 00:12:44,560
I'm going to say hello.

238
00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:47,514
I'm going to say Ari, I'm so pumped about this conversation.

239
00:12:47,514 --> 00:12:51,480
I'm glad you waited for me because I have been excited about this all day long.

240
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,744
Um, but I don't want to just talk.

241
00:12:53,744 --> 00:12:56,909
I want to know what the truth about you and what's going on in your mind.

242
00:12:56,909 --> 00:12:58,126
That's what I want to know.

243
00:12:58,126 --> 00:12:58,796
So got it.

244
00:12:58,796 --> 00:13:02,389
So let me, you got the right mindset while you're missing the structure and the
languaging.

245
00:13:02,389 --> 00:13:03,510
Here's how it goes.

246
00:13:03,510 --> 00:13:05,591
When they show up on zoom, here's what you say.

247
00:13:05,591 --> 00:13:09,013
First thing you say is, nice to meet you.

248
00:13:09,133 --> 00:13:10,514
Nice to meet you as well.

249
00:13:13,678 --> 00:13:14,438
Okay.

250
00:13:14,438 --> 00:13:16,958
Next thing you say is this, it's called top of the iceberg.

251
00:13:16,958 --> 00:13:18,218
Here's what you say first.

252
00:13:18,218 --> 00:13:25,138
If it's okay with you, Mark, if you wouldn't mind, take a step back for a moment, walking
with your back around your situation and up to your current technology concerns, whatever

253
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:28,318
you set, whatever your business concerns will go from there.

254
00:13:28,318 --> 00:13:34,822
Would that be okay with you, Take your fingers like this over your mouth like a doctor and
sit back in your chair, just like that.

255
00:13:35,019 --> 00:13:36,019
smoking?

256
00:13:36,302 --> 00:13:37,322
No, you know this does?

257
00:13:37,322 --> 00:13:38,762
It makes you do what?

258
00:13:39,982 --> 00:13:41,402
Don't talk.

259
00:13:41,482 --> 00:13:42,762
Shut up.

260
00:13:43,222 --> 00:13:44,542
Stop engaging.

261
00:13:46,062 --> 00:13:47,302
Stop talking about person.

262
00:13:47,302 --> 00:13:47,822
Stop.

263
00:13:47,822 --> 00:13:49,082
Stop the chemistry.

264
00:13:49,082 --> 00:13:50,242
Stop it.

265
00:13:50,242 --> 00:13:58,422
It's gonna be harder first because Mark, you're super outgoing and you just love to grab
that energy and make, and I love you for that, but I'm telling you right now, that's what

266
00:13:58,422 --> 00:13:58,982
they think.

267
00:13:58,982 --> 00:13:59,462
Oh shit.

268
00:13:59,462 --> 00:14:01,502
He's up to something being super nice to me.

269
00:14:01,502 --> 00:14:02,022
Okay.

270
00:14:02,022 --> 00:14:03,102
So I'll say it again.

271
00:14:03,102 --> 00:14:03,682
It is important.

272
00:14:03,682 --> 00:14:04,082
Language.

273
00:14:04,082 --> 00:14:05,550
If it's okay with you, if you wouldn't mind.

274
00:14:05,550 --> 00:14:07,190
Take a step back for a moment, John.

275
00:14:07,190 --> 00:14:16,410
Walk me through your background situation up to your current concerns you have related to
X and we'll go from there with that bit of a key with you, Now what this does is first of

276
00:14:16,410 --> 00:14:20,770
all, helps you like shut up, but it sends a message.

277
00:14:20,770 --> 00:14:23,310
It says, this call is not about me today.

278
00:14:25,370 --> 00:14:26,830
I'm the doctor.

279
00:14:26,830 --> 00:14:27,630
You're the patient.

280
00:14:27,630 --> 00:14:29,970
Doctors don't give you resumes about themselves.

281
00:14:29,970 --> 00:14:31,610
They say, where does it hurt?

282
00:14:31,610 --> 00:14:34,854
And they go, they adjust and go, oh.

283
00:14:35,150 --> 00:14:36,813
He asks you, what do you have to say?

284
00:14:36,813 --> 00:14:38,897
And they start downloading on you at hello.

285
00:14:38,897 --> 00:14:41,159
Within three seconds, they're talking.

286
00:14:41,481 --> 00:14:44,746
As you're hearing their problem, your systems will start doing what?

287
00:14:44,746 --> 00:14:47,190
As you hear the problem, they'll start to do it.

288
00:14:47,190 --> 00:14:48,160
Yep, you're problem-solving.

289
00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:49,510
Your brain's problem-solving.

290
00:14:49,510 --> 00:14:54,384
right away because when you know your stuff so well, their situation is not unique.

291
00:14:54,384 --> 00:14:56,215
You've heard a thousand times.

292
00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:58,236
So your brain is like, I got this.

293
00:14:58,236 --> 00:15:00,918
Oh yeah, definitely in the bag qualified.

294
00:15:00,918 --> 00:15:06,602
We asked a couple of questions, qualify them, they were after a sales process and there's
no trust being built at all.

295
00:15:06,602 --> 00:15:08,483
Now here's what we do instead.

296
00:15:08,684 --> 00:15:10,845
They, they, they download.

297
00:15:10,845 --> 00:15:11,846
Here's what you said.

298
00:15:11,846 --> 00:15:17,310
You summarize the core problem you say, so what I'm hearing from you is your core issues
are X, Y, and Z.

299
00:15:17,310 --> 00:15:18,410
Is that right?

300
00:15:19,106 --> 00:15:21,289
Always do this after every question.

301
00:15:21,289 --> 00:15:25,015
I know it's funny at first, but it'll, it'll calm you down.

302
00:15:25,015 --> 00:15:26,816
And then he goes, yeah, exactly.

303
00:15:26,918 --> 00:15:28,780
Is he saying this guy listens?

304
00:15:28,780 --> 00:15:29,922
Next question.

305
00:15:29,922 --> 00:15:33,256
How long has that been a concern for you for?

306
00:15:36,044 --> 00:15:38,855
What have you done so far on your own to try and resolve this?

307
00:15:41,556 --> 00:15:42,536
Okay.

308
00:15:42,536 --> 00:15:45,427
The next layer is called cost of inaction.

309
00:15:45,427 --> 00:15:46,957
COI.

310
00:15:46,957 --> 00:15:53,479
What's it costing them right now in their business and their company not to solve the
problem?

311
00:15:53,799 --> 00:15:57,737
You help them build a business case around what the impact is economically.

312
00:15:57,737 --> 00:16:02,221
If they can't justify the economic problem, they can't justify the fee to pay for it.

313
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:04,102
Everyone misses that part.

314
00:16:05,647 --> 00:16:11,190
You were building information, you're showing you're interested, but you're learning as
well what the problem is.

315
00:16:11,190 --> 00:16:13,952
That right there is the hook you just gave him.

316
00:16:13,952 --> 00:16:16,995
Like Gary V's book, he's jab, jab, jab, right hook.

317
00:16:16,995 --> 00:16:19,876
You just gave him the right hook and nobody even knows that's what it is.

318
00:16:20,037 --> 00:16:22,278
With that right there.

319
00:16:22,542 --> 00:16:24,445
Because you're not making assumptions.

320
00:16:25,107 --> 00:16:27,402
See, we assume as experts, we make assumptions.

321
00:16:27,402 --> 00:16:28,884
We assume we can do it.

322
00:16:28,884 --> 00:16:30,548
Because we're good at what we do.

323
00:16:30,548 --> 00:16:31,440
We're proud of what we do.

324
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:32,601
We want to flex.

325
00:16:32,642 --> 00:16:34,265
Got you.

326
00:16:34,265 --> 00:16:40,774
If you wait till the end where you allow them to get to a spot that they're going to make
a buying decision based on the cost, you're screwed.

327
00:16:41,036 --> 00:16:45,332
What you just did there in the middle, you just eliminated that from happening at the end.

328
00:16:46,358 --> 00:16:51,183
And the key with this, the last, there's a lot more, but the bottom question of this, the
icebreak is this one.

329
00:16:51,183 --> 00:16:51,958
Here it comes.

330
00:16:51,958 --> 00:16:53,525
It's the best one of all.

331
00:16:53,525 --> 00:16:59,189
Is this a priority for you to resolve once and for all?

332
00:16:59,791 --> 00:17:01,933
Or you have to live with it for a while and deal with it later on.

333
00:17:01,933 --> 00:17:03,464
I'm okay either way.

334
00:17:03,464 --> 00:17:04,385
Hands in the air.

335
00:17:04,385 --> 00:17:06,096
I'm okay either way.

336
00:17:06,597 --> 00:17:08,148
What's that saying to them?

337
00:17:09,165 --> 00:17:13,346
There's no pressure, you're not trying to sell them anything, you're just there to help
them solve their problems when they're ready.

338
00:17:13,346 --> 00:17:15,677
You're saying, hey buddy, it's not my problem.

339
00:17:15,677 --> 00:17:16,887
I'm fine.

340
00:17:17,067 --> 00:17:19,908
You've got the problem, but I got to ask you this question.

341
00:17:19,908 --> 00:17:20,988
The truth.

342
00:17:20,988 --> 00:17:24,469
Do you want to solve this or not?

343
00:17:24,469 --> 00:17:29,101
You'd be surprised how many people just want to shop around for solutions, but don't want
to commit to solving it.

344
00:17:29,101 --> 00:17:35,092
They love shopping, getting PDFs, looking for information, but to commit to solving it?

345
00:17:35,252 --> 00:17:37,423
You got to be the adult, they're the children.

346
00:17:37,423 --> 00:17:39,706
Johnny, pick up your clothes off the floor.

347
00:17:39,706 --> 00:17:41,344
You're not going to go to school today.

348
00:17:41,454 --> 00:17:46,354
Believe it or not, humans have a hard time committing to actually solving the problem.

349
00:17:46,354 --> 00:17:48,274
They'd shop around for free.

350
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:58,497
What I just heard here, is, you know, salespeople get a bad rap, but yet everybody who
acknowledges in business, if you're not selling, you're going to be out of business.

351
00:17:58,858 --> 00:18:07,844
However, what you've just done by shortening this sales cycle, you either get to the sale
or not, so you can be efficient and move on.

352
00:18:07,844 --> 00:18:13,528
But really the altruistic argument that I could make, you're helping the customer go
through the process.

353
00:18:13,528 --> 00:18:16,340
It's going to take them a lot longer to get through without you.

354
00:18:16,352 --> 00:18:18,504
It's very well said.

355
00:18:18,504 --> 00:18:23,549
You're helping them come to the conclusion that it's time to stop procrastinating.

356
00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:32,912
You could make a strong argument that even though there's strategy behind it and we're
doing this because we need to get through it, you are helping them successfully achieve

357
00:18:32,912 --> 00:18:33,373
something.

358
00:18:33,373 --> 00:18:40,474
you truly care and you have a product that can solve their problem, you're helping them
not only solve it a lot quicker.

359
00:18:40,735 --> 00:18:48,037
If you are someone that is not just of high trust, but this is high care, you care about
their outcomes, you care actually about helping them and doing the right thing.

360
00:18:48,037 --> 00:18:52,698
What's the chances they're going to come across someone that's going to care at that level
too?

361
00:18:52,858 --> 00:18:53,758
Small.

362
00:18:54,926 --> 00:18:58,829
The battle out there right now in trust recession is called indecisiveness.

363
00:18:59,351 --> 00:19:02,794
The inability to make a decision.

364
00:19:02,794 --> 00:19:05,077
That's why you always hear this at the end of your calls.

365
00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:06,558
I like to think about it.

366
00:19:07,439 --> 00:19:08,980
Think about what?

367
00:19:09,041 --> 00:19:10,402
Do you want us to-

368
00:19:10,752 --> 00:19:17,832
Yeah, when that happens to you, because I'm assuming it just hardly ever happens, but when
it does, what do you say?

369
00:19:17,976 --> 00:19:19,273
Say it to me right now.

370
00:19:20,706 --> 00:19:21,968
Hey Ari, thanks man.

371
00:19:21,968 --> 00:19:22,699
This was awesome.

372
00:19:22,699 --> 00:19:24,412
This was so valuable today.

373
00:19:24,412 --> 00:19:26,095
You've given me so much to think about.

374
00:19:26,095 --> 00:19:27,397
My brain's kind of breaking.

375
00:19:27,397 --> 00:19:28,783
I'm going to take all this information.

376
00:19:28,783 --> 00:19:29,761
I'm going to step away.

377
00:19:29,761 --> 00:19:31,033
I'm going to evaluate it all.

378
00:19:31,033 --> 00:19:35,182
And I don't know the exact timeframe, man, but by next week I'll get back to you and maybe
we'll

379
00:19:35,182 --> 00:19:38,222
first, first of all, I'm going to give them zero information.

380
00:19:38,222 --> 00:19:39,642
So they'll never have that.

381
00:19:39,642 --> 00:19:42,022
There's no, I don't give any information out because it's inappropriate.

382
00:19:42,022 --> 00:19:44,662
But if you said to me, I want to think about it, here's what I'd say back.

383
00:19:44,662 --> 00:19:47,002
I'd say, think about what?

384
00:19:47,862 --> 00:19:49,162
Do you want to solve your problem or not?

385
00:19:49,162 --> 00:19:50,422
That's all you have to decide on.

386
00:19:53,164 --> 00:19:53,654
You and your team.

387
00:19:53,654 --> 00:19:55,636
It's not about hiring you.

388
00:19:55,636 --> 00:19:59,040
It's about, they want to solve their problem or not?

389
00:19:59,040 --> 00:19:59,970
It's not about you.

390
00:19:59,970 --> 00:20:00,861
It's not about the sale.

391
00:20:00,861 --> 00:20:04,464
It's about their decision to commit to solving it.

392
00:20:04,885 --> 00:20:06,465
What is the line?

393
00:20:06,465 --> 00:20:15,985
Tell me what has happened in your life, even though you came upon this 20 or 21 years ago,
tell me what has happened on your life just over the past decade because of your

394
00:20:15,985 --> 00:20:19,060
understanding of this and what you're building.

395
00:20:20,352 --> 00:20:28,642
I would say that I, we have gotten so good at this that we almost have X-ray vision and we
can see through every particular issue.

396
00:20:28,642 --> 00:20:32,246
We have salespeople bring their live recordings to our meetings.

397
00:20:32,246 --> 00:20:35,647
They play them with the group or one-on-one with me or my coaches.

398
00:20:35,647 --> 00:20:37,647
And we literally stopped the tape.

399
00:20:37,767 --> 00:20:40,408
Like a football game, you know, the coach is like, stop.

400
00:20:40,408 --> 00:20:45,410
You turn the bowl and we stopped the tape and then we're like, you're talking to you
because my God, you're right.

401
00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:46,300
I talked too much.

402
00:20:46,300 --> 00:20:46,910
my.

403
00:20:47,054 --> 00:20:49,694
We don't need to realize what we're doing inside the conversation.

404
00:20:49,694 --> 00:20:56,314
We're so programmed to work hard, to engage, them forward, create chemistry.

405
00:20:56,314 --> 00:20:58,854
That's the wrong thing to do.

406
00:20:58,854 --> 00:21:00,714
Doctors don't do that.

407
00:21:00,714 --> 00:21:01,774
Now they have empathy.

408
00:21:01,774 --> 00:21:05,774
They care about you, but they don't work hard to become your friend.

409
00:21:05,834 --> 00:21:09,854
We were like the pharmacist and the doctor all in one.

410
00:21:09,854 --> 00:21:15,018
It's the date that pharmacy had off and then you, the doctor had only like, oh.

411
00:21:15,018 --> 00:21:15,898
Yeah, you're right.

412
00:21:15,898 --> 00:21:18,019
I'm giving away too much free consulting.

413
00:21:18,019 --> 00:21:28,354
It's amazing how programmed we are robotic We are brainwashed to keep pushing harder to
become their friend and give them value values been commoditized stop delivering value

414
00:21:28,354 --> 00:21:33,780
pre-sale Hmm, I know it like variant but truth no

415
00:21:33,780 --> 00:21:43,212
No, I mean, listen, don't contrarian cliche doesn't matter, but what we're sitting here,
honestly, what we're talking about is we're just talking about the truth.

416
00:21:43,212 --> 00:21:45,017
Yes, that's it.

417
00:21:45,110 --> 00:21:46,331
We're talking about the truth.

418
00:21:46,331 --> 00:21:58,140
So what part of what I've in the past, when my sales outcomes haven't been what I wanted
them to be or intended to be, and I had to go back and have reflection.

419
00:21:59,041 --> 00:22:06,316
I usually find myself, if I'm being honest and truthful, there's something about the
moment where I didn't succeed that I lacked confidence.

420
00:22:09,848 --> 00:22:12,702
Where did you gain in Garner and develop that from?

421
00:22:12,702 --> 00:22:16,896
Because first, you see it's an essential part of being able to execute this or no.

422
00:22:17,006 --> 00:22:18,090
Good question,

423
00:22:20,344 --> 00:22:23,116
You know, honestly, I've been at it for 20 years.

424
00:22:23,116 --> 00:22:24,847
It's only thing I've been doing, nothing else.

425
00:22:24,847 --> 00:22:28,649
Thousands of conversations with business owners and recordings.

426
00:22:28,649 --> 00:22:40,706
And I've just detected so many nuances that I can pick up so alert to that I'm at the
point now where um I just focus only on the truth and I let go of the sale altogether.

427
00:22:40,706 --> 00:22:45,458
In fact, my best clients, my BlackBall clients, they go into a first call, here's their
mindset.

428
00:22:45,458 --> 00:22:48,680
They're saying to themselves, they're probably not a fit.

429
00:22:49,878 --> 00:23:00,080
at Hello, which detaches themselves away from the sale, which gives them the ability to be
bold and ask the hard questions because these people need a truth teller, not a

430
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:01,322
salesperson.

431
00:23:03,980 --> 00:23:06,493
Honest, authentic, and bold.

432
00:23:06,493 --> 00:23:08,033
Not selling.

433
00:23:09,135 --> 00:23:09,976
That's what they need.

434
00:23:09,976 --> 00:23:12,918
They need someone they can trust, they can respect.

435
00:23:13,079 --> 00:23:15,601
They don't respect people who try to become their friend.

436
00:23:15,922 --> 00:23:20,426
That's when you go see a doctor, you're immediately like, okay, doc, whatever you say,
I'll do.

437
00:23:21,656 --> 00:23:26,678
Those black belt clients that you're talking about though, those are highly confident
folks.

438
00:23:26,862 --> 00:23:29,698
Well they are now, after going through transformation.

439
00:23:29,698 --> 00:23:30,920
That's what I'm talking about.

440
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:31,281
Yes.

441
00:23:31,281 --> 00:23:37,392
But what I'm saying is there's something about this confidence piece that until you can
really lean into that part.

442
00:23:37,392 --> 00:23:37,813
Yes.

443
00:23:37,813 --> 00:23:38,154
Yes.

444
00:23:38,154 --> 00:23:38,665
And you're right.

445
00:23:38,665 --> 00:23:40,398
You're not worried about what people think about you.

446
00:23:40,398 --> 00:23:43,102
The judgment about how you're not worried about that.

447
00:23:43,790 --> 00:23:49,530
Well, part of this is letting go of your own need to be liked and going for the sale.

448
00:23:49,710 --> 00:23:50,930
Here's why.

449
00:23:50,930 --> 00:23:52,510
They can pick that up for you with hello.

450
00:23:52,510 --> 00:23:53,170
They know it.

451
00:23:53,170 --> 00:23:55,030
The game's over at hello.

452
00:23:55,550 --> 00:23:59,010
You got to just shed the sales armor.

453
00:23:59,050 --> 00:24:00,590
Let it all go, man.

454
00:24:00,590 --> 00:24:02,250
You know where I got this from?

455
00:24:02,250 --> 00:24:04,990
My son Toby, he has Down syndrome.

456
00:24:04,990 --> 00:24:06,390
I wrote a book about him.

457
00:24:06,390 --> 00:24:08,990
And if you know someone with Down syndrome, you know how special they are.

458
00:24:08,990 --> 00:24:10,830
They're loving, they're transparent.

459
00:24:10,830 --> 00:24:11,770
You want to give them a hug.

460
00:24:11,770 --> 00:24:13,102
They just have no agenda.

461
00:24:13,102 --> 00:24:15,905
He's 22 now and I wrote a book about him called Lessons from Toby.

462
00:24:15,905 --> 00:24:16,486
Okay.

463
00:24:16,486 --> 00:24:20,610
And he influenced my work because he walks in the space of being present.

464
00:24:20,610 --> 00:24:22,261
He doesn't have an agenda for next step.

465
00:24:22,261 --> 00:24:24,764
I'm saying to myself, why can't we all be like him?

466
00:24:24,764 --> 00:24:26,496
Man, he's the hero.

467
00:24:26,496 --> 00:24:29,098
Here we are with our agenda and our plan, you know?

468
00:24:29,208 --> 00:24:31,411
We're worried about making the sale on the commission.

469
00:24:31,682 --> 00:24:33,885
He just wants to help connect.

470
00:24:33,886 --> 00:24:34,607
Yeah.

471
00:24:34,607 --> 00:24:35,879
We have to learn that skill.

472
00:24:35,879 --> 00:24:38,964
Especially with AI coming out.

473
00:24:39,448 --> 00:24:40,839
Yeah, let's touch on that.

474
00:24:40,839 --> 00:24:47,515
you know, the book, I'm not an avid reader of reading all the books, but every once in a
while I'll pick one or two up that really made an impact.

475
00:24:47,515 --> 00:24:51,178
And Ray Dalio's book, Principles, it was really dense.

476
00:24:51,178 --> 00:24:51,658
was really thick.

477
00:24:51,658 --> 00:24:54,870
That's a hard read because there's so many principles in there.

478
00:24:55,211 --> 00:24:56,232
But I walked out of it.

479
00:24:56,232 --> 00:25:08,452
There's this story about when he hires people in his company and it's about being honest
and they have a way on who has the honesty meter about a certain specific topic they're

480
00:25:08,452 --> 00:25:09,486
talking about.

481
00:25:09,486 --> 00:25:12,046
And my takeaway is how he led his company.

482
00:25:12,046 --> 00:25:23,066
He built the largest hedge fund in the world is it appears to me that he has convinced
himself and tries to instill it in all of his employees that when they walk into a room, a

483
00:25:23,066 --> 00:25:27,046
meeting, they're actually looking to be wrong.

484
00:25:27,566 --> 00:25:32,766
I don't know what that does to your brain, but they're looking for the, they're looking
for the holes in their thing.

485
00:25:32,766 --> 00:25:34,206
They're looking for the truth.

486
00:25:34,206 --> 00:25:39,234
They're not coming in to defend this definitive sales cycle or this idea or this theory.

487
00:25:39,234 --> 00:25:45,285
They're walking in saying, I have these things I've come up with I'm gonna discuss, but
today I'm gonna find out what I'm wrong about.

488
00:25:45,707 --> 00:25:47,740
That seems like that applies here.

489
00:25:47,948 --> 00:25:51,322
Very much so because they're, they're not coming in with any assumptions at all.

490
00:25:51,322 --> 00:25:52,984
That's why that's the difference.

491
00:25:53,045 --> 00:25:54,106
Zero assumptions.

492
00:25:54,106 --> 00:25:59,232
Like when you go see a doctor for a second opinion, did they ask you for the first
opinion?

493
00:26:00,775 --> 00:26:02,516
They start from scratch.

494
00:26:03,384 --> 00:26:08,402
They might be insulted that you did get someone else's opinion because they're going to be
so smart to figure out the problem.

495
00:26:08,526 --> 00:26:11,806
because their process is designed to have no assumptions.

496
00:26:12,646 --> 00:26:14,326
Clean, slight, and hello.

497
00:26:14,700 --> 00:26:16,256
Why is this so difficult?

498
00:26:16,256 --> 00:26:20,524
Why is this so breaking and you've been able to build a career on this idea?

499
00:26:20,524 --> 00:26:26,159
Because we've been wedded for years and influenced back in the eighties by the gurus, the
books we've read, the TV shows we've watched.

500
00:26:26,159 --> 00:26:30,183
We believe selling has always been about relationships.

501
00:26:30,343 --> 00:26:34,257
That was fine pre-COVID because you had a lot of time to wait to get that sale.

502
00:26:34,257 --> 00:26:38,541
But now you're being shocked before you weren't being shocked.

503
00:26:38,541 --> 00:26:40,012
That's the difference.

504
00:26:40,033 --> 00:26:45,966
So if you're still using the old no-like-and-trust model, man, you're going to struggle
because people aren't going to...

505
00:26:45,966 --> 00:26:49,006
hiring you because they like you, I promise you, nothing personal.

506
00:26:49,006 --> 00:26:50,166
You're probably all nice people.

507
00:26:50,166 --> 00:26:51,466
It's not about that.

508
00:26:51,466 --> 00:26:54,286
They don't want their problem solved and believe it.

509
00:26:54,286 --> 00:26:56,826
All they care about is someone to find someone they can trust.

510
00:26:56,826 --> 00:26:58,906
They don't really care about even how you solve it.

511
00:26:58,906 --> 00:27:00,206
They know what you do, by the way.

512
00:27:00,206 --> 00:27:01,246
It's not a mystery.

513
00:27:01,246 --> 00:27:02,326
went to the link.

514
00:27:03,266 --> 00:27:04,546
That's why they showed up.

515
00:27:04,546 --> 00:27:05,206
You're an ex.

516
00:27:05,206 --> 00:27:06,026
You do that.

517
00:27:06,026 --> 00:27:08,046
They're not questioning your efficacy.

518
00:27:08,046 --> 00:27:12,748
They can't prove your value until after they're a client, not before they're a client.

519
00:27:12,748 --> 00:27:16,353
So stop trying to prove yourself to people and stop flexing.

520
00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:18,982
So let's touch on AI a little bit here.

521
00:27:18,982 --> 00:27:21,654
think we have probably five to six to seven minutes.

522
00:27:21,654 --> 00:27:27,339
Everybody's talking about it, but I'm starting to have practical real world conversations
on what this is gonna be.

523
00:27:27,339 --> 00:27:37,647
I think the public, I think we're now on the precipice to realize the impact to AI is not
just the new search engine, because that's how consumers are still using it.

524
00:27:37,848 --> 00:27:42,271
The impact of AI are gonna be AI agents, how I see it over the next three to five years.

525
00:27:42,352 --> 00:27:45,154
It's gonna be the pseudo employee.

526
00:27:45,154 --> 00:27:51,744
that's doing the work as the AI agent and the really capable high level human is going to
be directing the agents.

527
00:27:52,813 --> 00:27:54,045
Just try green.

528
00:27:54,702 --> 00:28:04,002
What about this in this environment over the past 18 to 24 months, everything you knew,
the books that you've written, is AI changing it?

529
00:28:04,182 --> 00:28:06,242
Is it a complete new world?

530
00:28:06,842 --> 00:28:09,798
Or is it going to mold together in some way we don't see yet?

531
00:28:09,806 --> 00:28:17,486
As to relate to selling in particular in business, here's the way, and I wrote a book
about this called The Rise of AI, The Decline of Trust.

532
00:28:17,486 --> 00:28:18,206
It's one of my books.

533
00:28:18,206 --> 00:28:19,706
You can get in my package for free.

534
00:28:19,706 --> 00:28:27,386
But anyways, the point I was trying to say in that book is that AI will try and mimic as
much of a human being as possible.

535
00:28:27,386 --> 00:28:30,106
And they'll probably get better and better at it.

536
00:28:30,246 --> 00:28:37,726
So the only way to win this game against the computer is for us humans to get better at
trust building.

537
00:28:37,774 --> 00:28:40,834
to learn how to build trust with other humans a lot better.

538
00:28:40,834 --> 00:28:50,514
That way the humans will connect with the humans because unless we're not around anymore
and they take over, I'm going to rest that check is going to be a human being or at least

539
00:28:50,514 --> 00:28:52,474
behind that agent will be human.

540
00:28:52,554 --> 00:28:53,774
So they got to trust you first.

541
00:28:53,774 --> 00:28:58,194
So that could be marketing wise, Legion wise, funnel wise and conversation wise.

542
00:28:58,194 --> 00:29:01,074
Your whole process has to be trust based.

543
00:29:01,074 --> 00:29:04,214
Otherwise the agent or you will not trust the process.

544
00:29:06,124 --> 00:29:10,566
without us talking about some of the practical moments that we talked about how to do
this.

545
00:29:10,566 --> 00:29:12,257
And this is the proper question.

546
00:29:12,257 --> 00:29:17,539
So if we're going to get rid of the know and like, and we're going all into the trust,
right?

547
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:20,941
How do you describe it without talking about the process?

548
00:29:20,941 --> 00:29:27,213
And I'm like, okay, well then what does driving a high trust sales organization or sales
cycle?

549
00:29:27,213 --> 00:29:33,276
What's that look like again, without talking about the practical do this and say this and
what is high trust selling?

550
00:29:33,762 --> 00:29:44,847
High trust selling is figuring out how to compress the resistance, eliminate the
procrastination and help your client feel comfortable saying these words to you.

551
00:29:45,387 --> 00:29:46,768
Let's do this.

552
00:29:47,888 --> 00:29:52,530
And it's not from following up with them, not from chasing them, not from proposals.

553
00:29:52,530 --> 00:30:00,834
You got to rewire the culture of your company to say, how can we install trust as a system
in our business?

554
00:30:01,230 --> 00:30:04,230
and stop the act of selling, which is burning leads.

555
00:30:04,230 --> 00:30:05,830
I'll get a quick story for that.

556
00:30:05,830 --> 00:30:09,630
A guy called me today, runs a big sales team, 50 reps.

557
00:30:09,810 --> 00:30:13,390
He's like, Ari, why don't you come and speak to our group?

558
00:30:14,050 --> 00:30:16,830
We love what you have to say and we're doing, we'll have a great year.

559
00:30:16,830 --> 00:30:17,609
We'll have a good year.

560
00:30:17,609 --> 00:30:19,630
I'm like, well, what's the problem you want to solve?

561
00:30:19,950 --> 00:30:21,890
He said, I know, we just want to come in and love your materials.

562
00:30:21,890 --> 00:30:24,010
Hey, my guys like it, come on and give us a talk.

563
00:30:24,010 --> 00:30:25,590
What's the problem you want to solve?

564
00:30:25,610 --> 00:30:28,770
No, no, no, keep asking him four times.

565
00:30:28,770 --> 00:30:30,478
Finally I said, let me ask you a question.

566
00:30:30,478 --> 00:30:32,418
How many leads a month do get for your sales team?

567
00:30:32,418 --> 00:30:33,078
How much do they get?

568
00:30:33,078 --> 00:30:34,598
They go, he goes 100.

569
00:30:34,598 --> 00:30:36,798
Of the 100, how many convert to a new client?

570
00:30:36,798 --> 00:30:38,058
He goes 20.

571
00:30:38,058 --> 00:30:41,398
I said to him, what happened to the other 80?

572
00:30:41,838 --> 00:30:43,538
Why don't we work on that?

573
00:30:43,698 --> 00:30:46,238
least double 20 to 40, double your whole company.

574
00:30:46,238 --> 00:30:49,338
He's like, yeah, let's work.

575
00:30:49,338 --> 00:30:52,938
He himself could not even articulate his own problem.

576
00:30:54,018 --> 00:30:57,358
Clients can't even describe their own issues at that level.

577
00:30:57,378 --> 00:30:59,628
That's why you have to think about the iceberg.

578
00:30:59,628 --> 00:31:01,079
And it is tactical.

579
00:31:01,079 --> 00:31:02,881
First, the doctor thing is the mindset.

580
00:31:02,881 --> 00:31:05,543
Stage one is the doctor shift, phase one.

581
00:31:05,543 --> 00:31:08,906
Phase two is structure, don't have the iceberg, you ask those questions.

582
00:31:08,906 --> 00:31:14,091
And the last thing is what I call onboarding, but you need a visual roadmap for that.

583
00:31:14,091 --> 00:31:19,156
A visual tool that shows them step by step what your process is to solve their problem.

584
00:31:19,156 --> 00:31:20,356
I don't mean your services.

585
00:31:20,356 --> 00:31:22,147
A lot of guys at sales have a process.

586
00:31:22,147 --> 00:31:23,479
They go, here's step one.

587
00:31:23,479 --> 00:31:27,892
Now when you say it verbally, it goes in one ear and out the other ear.

588
00:31:27,918 --> 00:31:34,298
When we show them a visual roadmap, here's how we work, here's our process, they'll buy
the roadmap first before they buy you.

589
00:31:34,598 --> 00:31:38,178
You tighten that up and change, I'll give you example, change the language.

590
00:31:38,178 --> 00:31:45,378
Like rather than saying to somebody, I'm going follow up with you, or I'm calling to
follow up, never use that word ever again as of today for everyone to listen to this.

591
00:31:45,378 --> 00:31:46,458
Use this instead.

592
00:31:46,458 --> 00:31:54,598
I'm giving you a call to see if you have any feedback on our previous conversation and
feedback on the last meeting.

593
00:31:54,878 --> 00:31:55,960
Feedback and proposal.

594
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:57,881
Feedback's going away from the sale.

595
00:31:57,881 --> 00:31:59,532
Follow-up's going towards the sale.

596
00:31:59,532 --> 00:32:02,343
That's what sales reps say, stop using language like that.

597
00:32:02,343 --> 00:32:04,320
That's the worst thing to ever say to somebody.

598
00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:05,674
Here's one more tip.

599
00:32:05,674 --> 00:32:06,915
Don't ever say this in priest.

600
00:32:06,915 --> 00:32:08,895
Don't ever say this one before the sale.

601
00:32:08,895 --> 00:32:09,596
Here it comes.

602
00:32:09,596 --> 00:32:11,236
It's gonna hurt just a bit.

603
00:32:12,177 --> 00:32:15,688
Don't ever say, do you have any questions?

604
00:32:21,455 --> 00:32:22,877
What is that invite?

605
00:32:22,958 --> 00:32:25,943
Free consulting, picking your brain for information.

606
00:32:25,943 --> 00:32:27,785
Don't give them information.

607
00:32:27,785 --> 00:32:31,180
Give them clarity on their own problem.

608
00:32:32,876 --> 00:32:34,566
And I respect you and hire you.

609
00:32:35,736 --> 00:32:40,657
So what are you, RE AI, what is that system?

610
00:32:40,657 --> 00:32:42,911
what, there's so much information out here.

611
00:32:42,911 --> 00:32:43,893
What'd you build that for?

612
00:32:43,893 --> 00:32:45,134
What's that doing?

613
00:32:45,134 --> 00:32:47,014
That is my digital mind.

614
00:32:47,394 --> 00:32:53,994
have a private AI model that's only trained on my 25 years of content that no one else has
publicly.

615
00:32:54,174 --> 00:32:59,334
It's my voice, it's talking to me, hit a button, call Ari now, and I'm like, hey, it's
Ari, what's going on?

616
00:32:59,334 --> 00:33:01,014
You're literally talking to me live.

617
00:33:01,014 --> 00:33:05,034
I've got people right now who are using this, can go in behind and talk for, see this.

618
00:33:05,034 --> 00:33:11,214
We're on there now uploading emails, asking sales questions to me, having me coast some of
my objections.

619
00:33:11,214 --> 00:33:15,160
They're getting live coaching from their phone before a sale, after a sale.

620
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:16,172
trying to sort through everything.

621
00:33:16,172 --> 00:33:18,739
It's all inside of my new app called Selling with Trust.

622
00:33:18,739 --> 00:33:19,721
It's free by the way.

623
00:33:19,721 --> 00:33:21,557
And then this app store, you might get that.

624
00:33:21,557 --> 00:33:24,050
You download it for free, Selling with Trust on the app store.

625
00:33:24,834 --> 00:33:27,783
This is how we're all going to live forever under holograms.

626
00:33:27,783 --> 00:33:28,927
You're going to be, you build this.

627
00:33:28,927 --> 00:33:29,531
This is funny.

628
00:33:29,531 --> 00:33:31,575
I mean, this is, this is really what's happening in the world.

629
00:33:31,575 --> 00:33:32,838
oh

630
00:33:33,105 --> 00:33:36,278
my goal is replicate myself so I can, my business list beyond me.

631
00:33:36,278 --> 00:33:38,040
That's my ultimate mission.

632
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:39,742
So I've got coaches that work for me.

633
00:33:39,742 --> 00:33:41,383
I've got a replicated brain now.

634
00:33:41,383 --> 00:33:44,756
Now I'm building the community around that and that will now run without me.

635
00:33:45,464 --> 00:33:50,180
So what do you think the biggest problem that you're solving for all your clients and
people to come work for you?

636
00:33:50,180 --> 00:33:51,964
Like what's the problem you're solving?

637
00:33:52,430 --> 00:33:53,620
Problem I'm solving.

638
00:33:53,620 --> 00:33:56,160
I just wrote that down yesterday here and I'll give it to you.

639
00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:59,971
wrote a little statement around that because I was at a workshop and I workshopped this.

640
00:33:59,971 --> 00:34:01,174
Let's see, wrote down here.

641
00:34:01,174 --> 00:34:02,254
Here it is.

642
00:34:02,894 --> 00:34:12,358
We help low volume, high margin business owners acquire new clients without having to sell
themselves, chase or pursue the sale.

643
00:34:12,358 --> 00:34:13,098
Why?

644
00:34:13,098 --> 00:34:20,561
Because we believe non wither number trust building should replace the act of selling as
we know it.

645
00:34:22,860 --> 00:34:27,458
How often does a guy have the answer that you asked and he's like, you know, I just had it
right here, Mark.

646
00:34:27,458 --> 00:34:28,429
Like it was.

647
00:34:28,664 --> 00:34:34,601
I literally yesterday worked out, I was at Keynote yesterday and the guy after me, was
talking about us, I wrote it down.

648
00:34:35,150 --> 00:34:37,392
um What makes you excited about this?

649
00:34:37,392 --> 00:34:42,358
So you figured out and you're trying to train and replicate yourself and have people have
more success.

650
00:34:42,358 --> 00:34:45,781
But what excites you because you already know it.

651
00:34:45,781 --> 00:34:47,242
You know this now.

652
00:34:48,568 --> 00:34:49,819
You know what excites me?

653
00:34:49,819 --> 00:34:53,482
First of all, that we're the only ones in the world that can do this.

654
00:34:53,482 --> 00:34:57,315
No other sales manager or coach can do this because they don't have it as deep as we do.

655
00:34:57,315 --> 00:34:58,645
It's impossible.

656
00:34:58,812 --> 00:35:06,251
because if we do this one thing, but the biggest thing that excites me is the fact that
now more than ever trust is the lowest point in society.

657
00:35:06,932 --> 00:35:11,345
Now's the time for this message to get out there to help people succeed.

658
00:35:11,345 --> 00:35:15,198
You know, it's been an issue for many years, but now is like,

659
00:35:15,198 --> 00:35:18,989
Now more than ever, somehow, someone's like, Ari, you're an overnight success.

660
00:35:18,989 --> 00:35:20,560
I'm like, are you kidding me?

661
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:22,421
25 years I've been chipping away at this.

662
00:35:22,421 --> 00:35:23,359
And nothing's changed.

663
00:35:23,359 --> 00:35:24,701
It's the same problem.

664
00:35:24,701 --> 00:35:28,833
The difference is the water up in the beach went out to the ocean and exposed everything.

665
00:35:28,833 --> 00:35:31,544
Now everyone's going, oh man, I'm chasing ghosts.

666
00:35:31,544 --> 00:35:32,704
No one's calling me back.

667
00:35:32,704 --> 00:35:34,285
This is getting hard.

668
00:35:34,285 --> 00:35:35,025
Why?

669
00:35:35,025 --> 00:35:37,826
Because of the lack of trust.

670
00:35:39,714 --> 00:35:45,663
Um, take your tightest group of like your top three best friends.

671
00:35:46,185 --> 00:35:47,988
Do you just wear them out?

672
00:35:47,988 --> 00:35:52,414
Because I'm wondering if you do this to them just with every conversation.

673
00:35:53,214 --> 00:35:57,452
No, really, it's just people who are in that zone that are stuck struggling.

674
00:35:57,452 --> 00:35:58,865
I'm like the therapist, man.

675
00:35:58,865 --> 00:36:01,208
I only talk to patients who have problems.

676
00:36:01,474 --> 00:36:02,541
three good friends.

677
00:36:02,541 --> 00:36:04,609
So when you do this, do they run?

678
00:36:04,622 --> 00:36:06,463
uh That's my friends.

679
00:36:06,463 --> 00:36:07,454
They don't have these problems.

680
00:36:07,454 --> 00:36:09,385
There are other businesses than mine.

681
00:36:09,565 --> 00:36:14,089
But the people I meet who I can tell right away are struggling with their sales.

682
00:36:14,089 --> 00:36:16,110
They're the ones who get the doctor treatment.

683
00:36:16,270 --> 00:36:20,980
Okay, so the friends don't, maybe the friends give you the doctor treatment that we don't
know about.

684
00:36:22,158 --> 00:36:24,859
Yeah, I'm just gonna look out of those guys.

685
00:36:24,859 --> 00:36:25,620
Yeah, right.

686
00:36:25,620 --> 00:36:32,054
But isn't that what's special about, um, about your tight knit, your tight group that you
don't have to provide context.

687
00:36:34,734 --> 00:36:35,954
Not at all.

688
00:36:36,514 --> 00:36:41,654
But you know, cause you were commenting earlier on about materials you got from me and
kind of my position and all that.

689
00:36:41,654 --> 00:36:44,314
And it's funny cause we have a fantasy.

690
00:36:44,314 --> 00:36:49,294
We kind of wait for the phone call for somebody to kind of deem us and crown us as the
expert in something.

691
00:36:49,294 --> 00:36:51,594
And I waited for that phone call Mark for a long time.

692
00:36:51,594 --> 00:36:52,334
I never came.

693
00:36:52,334 --> 00:36:53,254
It's the weirdest thing.

694
00:36:53,254 --> 00:36:54,714
The phone still hasn't rung.

695
00:36:54,714 --> 00:37:01,474
So I said to myself, if I don't position myself as the owner of this, of this problem,
then nobody else will.

696
00:37:01,674 --> 00:37:02,574
So.

697
00:37:02,799 --> 00:37:11,969
Um, after 25 years doing this thousands of hours doing this, we finally have the only one
in world that the code on version rate at a higher result without having to do with more

698
00:37:11,969 --> 00:37:13,832
friction and more effort.

699
00:37:14,743 --> 00:37:16,038
And it's in the...

700
00:37:17,794 --> 00:37:23,565
Books it's in the world of every future digital encyclopedia.

701
00:37:23,565 --> 00:37:29,279
It's going to be prevent it's going to be who's the best at selling at high trust selling.

702
00:37:29,279 --> 00:37:30,920
It's going to have a picture of Ari in here.

703
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:32,161
I'm just, I'm just messing with you, man.

704
00:37:32,161 --> 00:37:35,252
But what I love is we jumped on the phone that

705
00:37:37,588 --> 00:37:42,763
Even though you're building this business, you've spent 25 years here that you own it.

706
00:37:42,984 --> 00:37:45,846
There is something about knowing that you're the best.

707
00:37:48,770 --> 00:37:50,856
Well, I don't say I did best.

708
00:37:50,856 --> 00:37:52,440
Here's the way I view it.

709
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:58,134
It's I know my customer and client better than they know themselves.

710
00:38:00,558 --> 00:38:03,211
So I can poke holes, find things they didn't even see themselves.

711
00:38:03,211 --> 00:38:09,548
They thought they own their space, that they're see the client seat that sees things 180
degrees.

712
00:38:09,569 --> 00:38:11,070
They're in the problem.

713
00:38:11,512 --> 00:38:12,553
You and I are experts.

714
00:38:12,553 --> 00:38:13,814
He thinks 360, right?

715
00:38:13,814 --> 00:38:17,078
When you see things 360 and they're one 80.

716
00:38:17,078 --> 00:38:20,532
Well, then they want to work with you.

717
00:38:21,816 --> 00:38:31,772
So are we tipping into a little bit, the mentalist space here a little bit, you know,
what, what, they say about the mentalist, what, sometimes you'll be meeting with someone

718
00:38:31,912 --> 00:38:33,914
and it's like, you're in their head.

719
00:38:33,914 --> 00:38:36,955
They'll say, is there a camera somewhere?

720
00:38:37,336 --> 00:38:40,777
Because that's exactly the problem I'm dealing with.

721
00:38:42,090 --> 00:38:43,350
That's what trust is.

722
00:38:43,350 --> 00:38:48,250
Trust is what someone says to themselves, man, this guy just gets me.

723
00:38:48,530 --> 00:38:49,870
He's my guy.

724
00:38:49,870 --> 00:38:50,870
We connect.

725
00:38:50,870 --> 00:38:52,510
He can read me.

726
00:38:52,510 --> 00:38:54,730
My God, I feel this connection.

727
00:38:54,950 --> 00:38:56,330
I resonate with him.

728
00:38:56,330 --> 00:38:57,770
That's what real trust is.

729
00:38:57,770 --> 00:38:59,710
You just got to it right there.

730
00:38:59,830 --> 00:39:02,970
When someone says he has no hidden agenda, but he understands me.

731
00:39:02,970 --> 00:39:06,610
That's why we have relationships with our husbands and wives and kids, because there's no
agenda.

732
00:39:06,610 --> 00:39:08,930
We just love them straight through.

733
00:39:08,930 --> 00:39:10,141
And that's what I'm trying to say.

734
00:39:10,141 --> 00:39:20,864
comes from my son, Toby, again, let go of your goal and focus on the other person, but go
deep inside their world to the point where they say to themselves, this guy just gets me.

735
00:39:20,864 --> 00:39:22,666
Don't cut loose early.

736
00:39:24,430 --> 00:39:27,772
Um, talk about the value as we wrap up here.

737
00:39:27,772 --> 00:39:35,157
you know, when we release everything is all the stuff's going to be tagged and stuff, but
I want you to talk about the value of this, of this compounded learning that you've been

738
00:39:35,157 --> 00:39:36,017
through.

739
00:39:36,618 --> 00:39:41,440
Because you talk about 25 years, it's not just about 25 of the same years.

740
00:39:42,061 --> 00:39:42,441
Right.

741
00:39:42,441 --> 00:39:49,375
And everybody, even though you're going to engage with them on this, it's not going to be
something that they're going to execute and be great at tomorrow just because they

742
00:39:49,375 --> 00:39:50,646
listened to you once.

743
00:39:51,022 --> 00:39:53,962
No, this is a starting point of your journey.

744
00:39:53,962 --> 00:39:57,742
you're hearing this right now, you're going, oh my God, this guy makes sense.

745
00:39:58,422 --> 00:40:03,522
Now get on the path as fast as possible because time is moving quickly, as you can see.

746
00:40:03,522 --> 00:40:08,202
And I'll just mention, if you want to my book for free, just go to thetrustbook.com.

747
00:40:08,202 --> 00:40:09,022
It's not that hard.

748
00:40:09,022 --> 00:40:10,262
Type that in.

749
00:40:10,262 --> 00:40:12,082
I'll mail the book for free in the mail.

750
00:40:12,082 --> 00:40:14,402
It's got a physical with a stamp on it.

751
00:40:14,402 --> 00:40:15,882
I'll send it to you for free.

752
00:40:15,882 --> 00:40:16,622
Read it.

753
00:40:16,622 --> 00:40:19,378
If it resonates with you, have a chat with us.

754
00:40:19,378 --> 00:40:28,594
And um those who want, if you want to access my course, my free one, it's called Mastering
the Mindset, go to the app store, tap on Selling with Trust, download the app, again

755
00:40:28,594 --> 00:40:31,166
there, and access my course, it's a lot of my community.

756
00:40:31,166 --> 00:40:38,700
We're growing quickly and it's a community only for trust-based business owners who want
to be part of our trust movement.

757
00:40:39,620 --> 00:40:42,591
Hey, one final one and we can jump off here because your show starts next.

758
00:40:42,591 --> 00:40:43,914
What's your show again?

759
00:40:44,044 --> 00:40:44,967
Stump the guru.

760
00:40:44,967 --> 00:40:48,687
We're live in 10 minutes at AriGalper.com or slash live.

761
00:40:48,687 --> 00:40:49,874
uh

762
00:40:49,874 --> 00:40:50,645
Give us something.

763
00:40:50,645 --> 00:40:54,318
You know how a lot of people have an issue with taking action and getting started.

764
00:40:55,060 --> 00:40:56,962
So let's say they don't go buy your book.

765
00:40:56,962 --> 00:40:57,972
It sounds great.

766
00:40:57,972 --> 00:40:59,184
You're brilliant.

767
00:40:59,184 --> 00:41:00,075
High trust selling.

768
00:41:00,075 --> 00:41:01,176
They're buying into it.

769
00:41:01,176 --> 00:41:03,775
have to buy anything it's free just FYI

770
00:41:03,832 --> 00:41:06,465
But I actually believe that it's an exchange of their time.

771
00:41:06,465 --> 00:41:08,266
There's something that's keeping people.

772
00:41:08,266 --> 00:41:10,309
It's not about just a credit card, right?

773
00:41:10,309 --> 00:41:12,610
So give us one thing.

774
00:41:13,072 --> 00:41:18,127
Just give us one little thing to make us better today when we're engaging with humans.

775
00:41:18,127 --> 00:41:23,444
If we don't go get the book for free, just something that we can take away right now that
we can do.

776
00:41:23,444 --> 00:41:34,077
Say focus on listening in the purest sense possible, but not listening for the next thing
for you to say.

777
00:41:35,217 --> 00:41:36,557
Be present.

778
00:41:37,498 --> 00:41:39,838
Allow them to sense from you.

779
00:41:39,838 --> 00:41:42,239
You aren't trying to move them forward.

780
00:41:42,439 --> 00:41:44,740
That's a skill you have to learn.

781
00:41:44,894 --> 00:41:47,511
It applies to your personal life as well, by the way.

782
00:41:47,511 --> 00:41:48,331
Okay.

783
00:41:48,331 --> 00:41:52,132
This is, this is just communication.

784
00:41:52,132 --> 00:41:53,048
It's not trust.

785
00:41:53,048 --> 00:41:53,448
selling.

786
00:41:53,448 --> 00:41:59,084
I added that word so people know kind of what it is, but this is about building trust with
humans.

787
00:41:59,525 --> 00:41:59,975
Okay.

788
00:41:59,975 --> 00:42:02,067
This is basic level stuff.

789
00:42:02,067 --> 00:42:03,669
We can apply it to lots of things.

790
00:42:03,669 --> 00:42:07,118
Our kids, our family dating applies to selling.

791
00:42:07,118 --> 00:42:08,915
I'm just honing in on selling part.

792
00:42:08,915 --> 00:42:10,366
So I hope people kind of get this.

793
00:42:10,366 --> 00:42:12,718
This is life changing in so many different ways.

794
00:42:13,430 --> 00:42:14,161
Ari Gopper.

795
00:42:14,161 --> 00:42:14,561
you, man.

796
00:42:14,561 --> 00:42:18,075
Hey, go, uh, go be the guru of all things on your live show.

797
00:42:18,075 --> 00:42:20,618
Thanks for spending 45 minutes from Australia with us.

798
00:42:20,618 --> 00:42:22,660
And, I appreciate the time.

799
00:42:23,642 --> 00:42:24,542
Thank you.